Everything comes in threes
Reading over Robb's latest post, I looked back on my life, and just like Robb I discovered that there have only been three women in my life that I have felt strongly enough about to consider "settling down" with.
The first one was my first real "girlfriend" - I had just moved to a new state, I was going into 8th grade, and she was one of the first people I met on the bus to school. Looking back now, I can't remember what initially attracted me to her, but I remember she had a great smile. She went on to become my first steady girlfriend (I was a late bloomer), my first real kiss, and if it had been up to me, she would have been my first to go "all the way" with. But it wasn't meant to be - her dad was in the milatary and got stationed overseas, so our relationship came to an end. But we stayed in touch while she was overseas, and we would always try to make sure we saw each other whenever she came back to the States. I even flew halfway around the world to visit her my senior year in high school - but ironically we ended up fighting the whole time I was there, so I started to wonder if we were meant to be together after all. But we kept in touch, and we had an unwritten rule that even if we were dating other people, we would still hook up whenever we saw each other. She ended up going to school half a country away, and I stayed on the East Coast
The second one I met during high school - she was a good friend's little sister. We met when she tagged along with her sister to a party at a friend's house, and we instantly hit it off. And even though there was a slight age difference (I was a senior and she was a freshman), we totally connected emotionally. She was definitely ahead of her time (physically and emotionally) - she was more mature at 15 than I was at 18. I'm not sure whether that's a compliment to her or an insult to me, but she is by far one of the smartest people I have ever met...the kind of person who you actually believe could do anything and be anything they wanted to be. Looking back it's a miracle we ever ended up together, because during high school I was busy trying to prove to the world that I was the complete opposite of her - I was the stereotypical headbanger who was fighting "the system" - you now the type...the long hair having, jean-jacket and black Metallica T-shirt wearing, cigarette and other substance smoking, Rebel without a clue that flourished during the 80's and early 90's. But she always saw past all that and saw the true potential in me, and always pushed me to be a better person. I think in some ways I was a challenge for her, somebody who needed to be fixed and made better. We dated on and off for about a year, and then went our separate ways when I went off to college. She ended up going to college in California, but we ended up running into each other a few years later after I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, and we tried dating again, and for a few months it was amazing, including some of the most amazing sex I've ever had. But she was determinined to live on the West Coast, and I wasn't ready to leave the East Coast.
The third I met while I was in college. She was working as a waitress at a restaurant me and my friends used to go to all the time while she put herself through nursing school. She always took all the crap we gave her and gave as good as she got, and I started eating at this restaurant more and more. And since the food wasn't that great, I realized that wasn't why I kept coming back. Soon we were dating, and for the next two years or so there was never a dull moment. She was a redhead, and it's true what they say about their tempers. And she had a lot of messed-up things happen to her in the past, and the more I learned, the more I was amazed she was able to go on at all. And then she had a number of medical problems, culminating in having to have one of the valves in her heart replaced. She was always jealous of how easy she thought everything in my life had been, and I was always in awe of how normal she was able to be given all that had happened to her. We eventually got to that point where the relationship either had to go to the next level or go away.
So how did it all work out? Two of the great loves of my life are gone - they both ended up marrying Navy men and I'm sure they're doing fine. The third one I'm married to right now.
The first one was my first real "girlfriend" - I had just moved to a new state, I was going into 8th grade, and she was one of the first people I met on the bus to school. Looking back now, I can't remember what initially attracted me to her, but I remember she had a great smile. She went on to become my first steady girlfriend (I was a late bloomer), my first real kiss, and if it had been up to me, she would have been my first to go "all the way" with. But it wasn't meant to be - her dad was in the milatary and got stationed overseas, so our relationship came to an end. But we stayed in touch while she was overseas, and we would always try to make sure we saw each other whenever she came back to the States. I even flew halfway around the world to visit her my senior year in high school - but ironically we ended up fighting the whole time I was there, so I started to wonder if we were meant to be together after all. But we kept in touch, and we had an unwritten rule that even if we were dating other people, we would still hook up whenever we saw each other. She ended up going to school half a country away, and I stayed on the East Coast
The second one I met during high school - she was a good friend's little sister. We met when she tagged along with her sister to a party at a friend's house, and we instantly hit it off. And even though there was a slight age difference (I was a senior and she was a freshman), we totally connected emotionally. She was definitely ahead of her time (physically and emotionally) - she was more mature at 15 than I was at 18. I'm not sure whether that's a compliment to her or an insult to me, but she is by far one of the smartest people I have ever met...the kind of person who you actually believe could do anything and be anything they wanted to be. Looking back it's a miracle we ever ended up together, because during high school I was busy trying to prove to the world that I was the complete opposite of her - I was the stereotypical headbanger who was fighting "the system" - you now the type...the long hair having, jean-jacket and black Metallica T-shirt wearing, cigarette and other substance smoking, Rebel without a clue that flourished during the 80's and early 90's. But she always saw past all that and saw the true potential in me, and always pushed me to be a better person. I think in some ways I was a challenge for her, somebody who needed to be fixed and made better. We dated on and off for about a year, and then went our separate ways when I went off to college. She ended up going to college in California, but we ended up running into each other a few years later after I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, and we tried dating again, and for a few months it was amazing, including some of the most amazing sex I've ever had. But she was determinined to live on the West Coast, and I wasn't ready to leave the East Coast.
The third I met while I was in college. She was working as a waitress at a restaurant me and my friends used to go to all the time while she put herself through nursing school. She always took all the crap we gave her and gave as good as she got, and I started eating at this restaurant more and more. And since the food wasn't that great, I realized that wasn't why I kept coming back. Soon we were dating, and for the next two years or so there was never a dull moment. She was a redhead, and it's true what they say about their tempers. And she had a lot of messed-up things happen to her in the past, and the more I learned, the more I was amazed she was able to go on at all. And then she had a number of medical problems, culminating in having to have one of the valves in her heart replaced. She was always jealous of how easy she thought everything in my life had been, and I was always in awe of how normal she was able to be given all that had happened to her. We eventually got to that point where the relationship either had to go to the next level or go away.
So how did it all work out? Two of the great loves of my life are gone - they both ended up marrying Navy men and I'm sure they're doing fine. The third one I'm married to right now.
posted by Nebbitt at
11:02 AM
7 Comments:
I was just looking at a picture with #2 and the girl I was with at the time just the other day. Good times...
Funny, I've dated guys but never saw myself with them in the future. I had one relationship that lasted five months and the rest never made it past three months until I met my ex. Do you think I have a problem with commitment? LOL!
robb - those were good times, but the times with #2 in California were much better! Did you ever meet #3?
lilith - call me crazy, but I knew I would end up marrying one of the three, and I was right. All of the other relationships I ever had I knew were destined to end...it was just a matter of when.
Great post. Which one did you marry?
Wow! A whole day without blogging. Are you feeling OK? I know work wasn't that great today!
kate-
For the record, I married #1.
lilith-
Going on two whole days without a post - work is really sucking this week!!
Great post. I've had several long-term relationships, but only pictured a future with one of them. He lived in Tampa, I lived in KC, it was rough. Unfortunately, it didn't work out, the distance was too much and neither of us could move at the time.
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